How did you spent your Deepavali?

Hi folks!

I spent mine in the hospital. Went to A & E around 12.35am(with full of firecrackers and celebration all around). Baby Zen was having difficulties breathing and fever due to croup. It happened very fast. On Thursday we can see he is having hoarse voice. I thought due to screaming a lot at babysitter's place(asking to be carried?/attention?) as I did not see him coughing then. On Friday night, when I picked him up, he totally lost his voice and started coughing. His dad went out and around 11pm+ I started calling him as baby Zen seems to be having difficulties not only sleeping but also breathing. As I googled about it, croup came into picture.

All the symptoms, hoarse voice, high temperature, difficulties breathing(with seal-like sound at each breathe) said we gotta send him to hospital right away. I've tried steam method but it does not help.

But it's Deepavali! Gosh, wonder where I should bring him. Text my siblings and Mommies friends at Facebook(yep, you'll be surprised there are many mommies who responded fast and give many useful advice during these needful time!), we went to ColumbiaAsia with medical card at hand(praying there's good medical officer on duty and there'll be Ped on duty despite it's Deepavali day).

When I saw the medical officer on duty is a pregnant lady(I was half relief) as this usually means she will be more "prihatin" in Malay, or more sensitve towards babies condition as I do hear stories whereby some kids are treated rather "coldly" where my nephew was given cold bath during wee hours in the morning when he had fever for over 39 degrees which might make certain kids having fits..at such extreme hot and cold temperature out of a sudden.

Then baby was given nebulizer thrice to which he screamed and cry for help. Heartbroken. Then the doctor said we have to get ready to admit him. Another ordeal I nearly tear down the door when they keep the door locked while taking Zen's blood samples and poked him to put on the intravenous needles(twice on his palm but couldn't find his veins then finally found at his feet). All throughout we were kept behind locked doors while hearing him screams and cry for good 15minutes. So so sad!!! Will never forget this ordeal my bb went through as from birth till now he never ever cry so long and so badly. He's always full of smiles. At that moment can see he's in trauma. No smiles only fears in his eyes. When he saw he nurse in blue shirt, he started crying before they even put anything on him. I start to regret bringing him to hospital at that moment. At least at home, he still able to cry and respond to us. But in the hospital it's only pleas and cries of help which went unresponded as there's nothing we able to do then. Can only watch and cry in our heart. For the first time I saw DH eyes bit reddish.

Poor baby had to suffer all these at age of 5months. I told baby in his ears, it's only baby u'll be ok after one day(even though the medical officer said might need to stay 2-3days). He was then too tired from the ordeal to respond to me. I just carried him and soothing him(breast feed him while waiting for a room/wad).

Overall I must say the nurses handled professionally. They too doted and took a liking with Zen cuteness and later when he recovered from heaving breathing and back to his cheerful self, his dimpled-smiles. We are so glad to have our cheerful baby back!

Glad that we had given priority to a single bed wad. Their reason being to avoid being exposed to virus by sharing rooms with other sick child as baby is still so young. And it's what most parents requested to it seems as single bed room allows both parents to stay overnight to take turns looking after the baby. As the older kids still needed someone to take care of, I spent the night alone with baby at the hospital. Wai finally left the hospital around 3am plus, looking visibly tired and weak.

Next morning, I SMS-Ed a list of items to bring(but he couldn't find 70% of the items at home..mommies do you faced the same scenario too? I think after this I need to do a round of orientation to show him where are things put). Thus I said never mind, you come and exchange spot with me, I'll go home to pack the things. And when he came, can see he's not feeling well, having cold. Thus, I spent the second day and night with baby alone.

I am so glad to my fast respond of help from my sister, who gathered my support team in time and my parents took over caring for the older two kids and Wai could rest at home.

At this time as I am writing this ordeal(for my future reading in the future too), no mood/time to capture any snapshots, but writing these down hopefully will remind us to practice more vigilance with people handling the baby (us included), baby Zen I discharged from hospital on the second day. He's still coughing with phlegm but no more fever or seal-like sound when he breathes. Thanks to the Ped, Dr. Wong who was still on duty during Deepavali and Sunday, am so glad. To this, I reminded myself of my prayer I made that I would not say any negative words or make any negative comments/emotions to bring blessings up my child. Thanks God to all the right people, timing and condition happening at the right moment.

I was thinking about how it all happened throughout the night. People are usually dwelling on the negative side when such difficult times happeneds I felt. E.g., I was wondering is it cos the babysitter has been bringing Zen out frequently and expose him with lots of virus(as he's still a young baby whose immunity system is still building up). Or it might be from hi sister and me(who are coughing). Anyway, no matter what I reminded myself to be positive and think of what to do next. I had to remind babysitter not to bring baby out till he get better(I can't her not to bring him out totally can I? Sigh...this is the time when all working moms would felt, how we wished we could take care of our child on our own. As no one would put the child priority at top of our decision making. For others, they'll just have 101 reasons to make every other decision. Like they need to, at their convenient etc...k I better not dwell on this as I have promise not to think negatively.

Let's see how things progressed tomorrow. I need to send baby to babysitter as I need so send DH to doctor and also get the cleaner to clean the whole house to clear the dust and particles so that it does not further exaggerates the cough. Heartbroken having to send Zen to babysitter despite just being discharged and needing all the comfort he need to regain his sense of security. Will babysitter has the patience and time to give him the attention and body contact(carrying him) with no complaints when he needed it? Sigh...most babysitters or even olderlu folks will said NO! To carrying but only a mom or the parents would able to understand why they needed it at this moment of discomfort and insecure feelings they have. But I've got no choice as I can't keep the baby with me when I clean the house. And while the older kids are away, it's the best time I get the house cleaned before they are back. Seriously, I think I need to get cleaning service at least once a month as I totally do not have the luxury of time and energy for all these thorough cleaning on my own. Despite the help of DH. I think we can only cover the basics.

So yea till Zen is well soon..I better take a nap while he slept. I need to be fit as ever during this time. Can't afford to raise white flag ..cheers and would appreciate your prayers for Zen and even give your child a big hugs and take some time to be with them despises all the housework and busy stuff u have ok(like now..blog-hopping can be done later) moments with them will never return..have a blessed Holiday folks! Thanks for reading :)

Cheers!

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